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Father Bill

Accepting our vulnerability

Editor's Desk

Sustained by Faith

Ministry Report

Mission Trip to New Orleans

Prayerful Notes

The Christian Example

Miscellaneous

Cherokee Wisdom The National Everything

The Beacon, September 2007

Accepting our vulnerability

The courage to be vulnerable, to open ourselves to others is based upon the awareness that all persons have weakness and strength. What has always been comforting to me about the Church is that it is a community of faith, not a collection of perfect individuals. Someone once used the image that we're all mountain climbers, sharing a common rope to reach the summit together. We all need each other and we're all bound to each other. Yet our culture often equates success with rugged individualism. We have been taught from the time we were little children that we are to try to succeed at every we do. The idea is that if we try hard enough, we can succeed at anything, but we all know that that is not always the case. In fact, it takes an incredible amount of courage to admit responsibility for a failure once it is apparent to other people. It might be a broken relationship, a horrible year at a new job, the shattering of a lifelong dream, maybe even a poor showing in a high school, college, or graduate course. These kinds of failures scare us, and it takes time to recover from them. And, oh, do these shortcomings make us vulnerable before others. We are often ashamed, embarrassed, and mortified. We are often laughed at or ridiculed, and yet failure is often redeemable if we learn something that will help us live life more realistically. There's never been a breakthrough in science or in the arts or in relationships until someone who had the courage to fail moved beyond "the sure thing".

Twenty-five years ago, I accepted a call to a parish that had severe conflicts among its membership. I failed to see those conflicts. Instead, I was blinded by my success at being called as rector to a large parish of 400 plus members at such a young age. I had just passed thirty; most parishes that size call clergy in their fifties who have had a great deal of experience in the ministry. I stayed there for four years. The first two years were great, the last two were hellish. I felt that I was being crucified, caught in the middle between two factions, who in their anger with each other, directed some of it at me. When I finally left to take another parish, a much smaller one, I felt like a colossal failure. I had neither the experience nor the training to adequately minister to those factions. It took me almost fifteen years to recover from that experience, but I think I'm better for it.

I'm not proud of any of my failures and shortcomings. But they're a part of me. They're written deep within my heart. I'm not proud of the envy I sometimes feel toward those rectors who prove to be so successful in similar situations as mine. I'm not proud of the anger that sometimes wells up in me when I think back to that time described above, but the envy and the anger are also a part of me.

The deepest act of faith of which I am capable is to believe that God knows me in all my weakness and still loves me. I believe that God forgives my shortcomings and accepts me as I am. This belief frees me from servitude to my failures, which I have known so well. My relationship with God ultimately gives me the courage to face up to life. My prayer is that God does the same for you.

Faithfully, Fr Bill

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Sustained by Faith

I'd like to talk this month about three extraordinary women I have encountered just recently. The first is Mother Teresa and the revelation of her almost life-long struggle with her faith. She struggled for many years, wondering where God was in her life. There seem to be two major takes on her revelation.

  1. That she will serve as an inspiration to many people who are struggling we/ their own faith.
  2. That her struggles prove that religion is a man-made institution and that there really is no God.

I take comfort in the fact that she struggled. I feel not quite so bad about my own shortcomings. I believe that this revelation in no way diminishes the great works she accomplished and that she was truly called by God for her ministry to the poor.

The second woman I encountered was Evelyn Lehman Ryan, the subject of the book (and movie) "The Prize Winner of Defiance Ohio, (how my mother raised 10 kids on 25 words or less)". This book is the biography of a woman who - although she didn't acknowledge that it was faith in God nonetheless managed her life knowing that somehow or other, things would work out. Evelyn lived a difficult life, raising ten children and coping with an alcoholic husband who contributed little to the running of the household.

But Evelyn was a gifted contest slogan writer. Back in the fifties and sixties when contests to write or complete a slogan in 25 words or less were very popular. Evelyn had a unique talent for knowing what the sponsors of the contest would find acceptable. She learned to play particular attention to the rules and even got to the point where she knew what the different companies who judge the entries would be impressed by.

And Evelyn was convinced that when times got really tough, one of her entries would result in a prize or some badly-needed money. I liked the little rhyme she wrote shortly before her death (in exactly 25 words)

And the third woman is my sister Audrey. Audrey has Multiple Sclerosis and is confined to a wheelchair in a nursing home in Camden, Maine. She is aware that she is in the late stages of the disease. She is confined to the first floor of the nursing home which holds mostly patients with Alzheimer's Disease. Sharyn and I visited with her a few weekends ago and came away impressed with the way she is handling her situation.

My sister's mind is still very sharp, and she finds it difficult being with patients whose ability to communicate is limited or even non-existent. Fortunately, she has some regular visitors who come in to talk with her. And she keeps up on current affairs nationally and locally. She also takes great delight in her grandsons who write her stories (usually featuring Grandma) and she is writing stories for them.

Audrey is an ordained Congregational minister and has a strong faith in God; she still is able to preach once a month at the nursing home services. She also has become a counselor for many of the staff at the nursing home. They come to her with problems and concerns because they know she will listen and be non-judgmental.

So she knows she fills a need in the lives of many, and knows it's part of God's plan, as is the constant pain she lives with. She is ready to die, in fact she would welcome it because she knows that death would bring an end to her pain.

Sharyn and I enjoyed the time we spent with Audrey; it was heartening to see the strength of her faith. We hope that later this year we'll be able to make another visit. Three women, each in her own way, who have succeeded in spite of the challenges life has thrown them; each has been sustained by faith, not always leaning on God, but by their lives, showing what faith can do. I hope I can be as strong.

Peace, Fred Philcox

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Mission Trip to New Orleans

"The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble." "But the needy will not always be forgotten, nor the hope of the afflicted ever perish." - Psalm 9:9,18

We arrived August 5th in New Orleans with much anticipation of what awaited us. It proved to be a most meaningful, insightful and eye-opening experience; one that will always be embedded in our memories. We arrived in the Lakeview area and found our way to the St Paul's Homecoming Center. It was a new building to house volunteers and also served as an office for the Beacon of Hope. We found our army cots to be comfortable enough, and the mobile shower units, although not too pleasant, at least allowed us to get clean. As we drove through the middle class neighborhood, we found many vacant lots where homes once stood, condemned homes, lots, and homes for sale and some new homes. The pizza place where we had lunch had just reopened two weeks ago. Starbucks, also recently opened, had a thickly painted line about 8 to 10 feet off the ground with the word "Katrina" above it. The Rite-Aid pharmacy reopened while we were there. We then drove up the street to Lake Ponchertrain where we had the good fortune of meeting two local women who taught the young adults how to catch crabs. One of the women we would meet again later in the week, who then shared some of her story of getting back on her feet after nine moves since August 29th, 2005.

The next two days found us riding aboard the Episcopal Diocese of Louisiana's large RV which served as the Mobile Care Respite Unit, traveling to the still greatly devastated Ninth Ward and Mereaux in St Bernard's Parish. Large piles of debris and wood were abundant, as were multiple blocks of ruined homes, many FEMA trailers in front of homes or FEMA trailer parks, and a large number of stores (including big chains stores like Walgreen's, Wal-Mart, Family Dollar, K-Mart and supermarkets) which remained boarded up or in total disarray with debris and filth.

We passed at least one elementary school that still sits behind a metal fence with a "no trespassing" sign attached. The residents were most gracious for the bare staples we gave - a bag with a roll of toilet paper, a roll of paper towels, a couple of snacks, a Ziploc bag with laundry detergent, one canned good, and a bottle of cold water. Some shared stories, some asked for help because their situation had become so dire. We prayed for and with them.

The following three days we performed outside clean-up with the Beacon of Hope. We helped a single older woman by cleaning up her yard and then digging up her dirt and weed encased stepping stones. Although it may have seemed minor and trivial (although it was not an easy task), it is one more step in the recovery and rebuilding process, giving her hope that life will soon be back to where it was two years ago. We helped clean up a park, which again will give residents the hope of rebirth as they settle back in. Finally, we cleared many vacant lots that had become overgrown with weeds. The streets must be habitable to entice residents to return or to get new residents to settle.

We departed late on August 10th knowing we had made a difference in the lives of others. We helped many who continue to struggle every day. The people of New Orleans were very warm and welcoming and greatly appreciated our volunteer efforts. The return to pre-Katrina state is taking a very long time and demands so much patience.

As we approach the second anniversary of the devastation of New Orleans, we must ask ourselves, "How can we continue to help?" The youth who went Alex Boyer (who turned 18 while away!), Melissa Brady and Ross Scharen, along with my co-chaperone Melanie Daniels, have vowed to continue to help our struggling friends. Deacon Quin Bates of LA said that clothing is still needed. We would like to collect new or very gently used clothing and send it down periodically.

Please look for collection bins in Fay Hall and help us to continue to help those whose suffering has gone on for a long time. Thank you for supporting us in our bake sales and car wash to make this trip a reality. You can go to www.edola.org and look under office of disaster relief to read more or to www.LakewoodBeacon.org to find out more about the Beacon of Hope.

Wendy Scharen

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The Christian Example

Many of you may recall the button campaign that we had at St. Stephen's several years ago, during the holiday season. The buttons read "Christmas is a Birthday at St Stephen's church." We were asked to wear our buttons every day and if anyone said they liked it, we were to take it off and give it to them. It was a wonderful, comfortable form of evangelism. I found it to be more than that though. It was a reminder to me of who I am called to be as a Christian. Somehow when I put that button on, it reminded me of who I was representing in the world. Whether I was stuck in traffic or feeling myself getting impatient in a long check-out line, that button reminded me to keep a right attitude. It gave me a "Godly attitude adjustment," when I needed it the most.

After the holidays passed, I missed having that button to remind me that I am called to be Christ's witness in the world. I think that is when I began wearing my cross every day. Crosses are very much in vogue these days. They come in many different styles, are worn by a wide variety of persons, and probably for a wide variety of reasons. For myself personally, I wear a cross to remind me of who I am called to represent in this world. In this hectic, fast paced world, I need all the help I can get. This was recently brought home to me very clearly.

I had purchased a new washing machine. When they came to install it, however, they found that the drain hose was too short. I was told I had to go back to the store, order an extension kit and make a new appointment for installation. I trudged back to the large appliance center, where I felt like a ball, being passed from one salesperson to the next, none of whom seemed to know how to resolve my problem. It was a hot muggy day. I was tired and hungry and my patience was wearing pretty thin. The tone in my voice now had a bit of "an edge" to it and I had left my smile back at home.

Then came that still small voice inside of me, "Remember, Phyl, you're the lady with the cross around your neck." I sorely needed that reminder. The situation was a minor inconvenience, not a life crisis. I calmed down, drew on a bit of reserve patience, and the problem did get resolved with a positive outcome.

Being a Christian does not grant us immunity from the problems in life. It does, however, show us a better way of handling our problems. The Bible is quite clear about how we are to act out our faith.

We are called to act out our faith through example.

It is easy to get caught up in the emotions of the moment. I will continue to wear my cross every day for it reminds me of the person I want and continue to try to be. I often fall short and am ever thankful for the patience of our loving God.

Blessings Always, Phyl Endicott

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Cherokee Wisdom

The following was brought back to St Stephen's by Peter Kite who encountered it on the recent adult trip to South Dakota.

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a debate that goes on inside people. He said:

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked, "Which wolf wins?" The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

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The National Everything

Actors and Back Stage Crew needed for this play about an over-exuberant advertising department, their apoplectic boss, and an assortment of frustrated consumers. Actors are needed for large and small parts. No memorizing needed. Back Stage Crew wanted to help with props, scenery, costumes, makeup, and more.

If interested, contact on of the following:

Rehearsal/Performance Schedule

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